“I have no magic solution”

It would be more accurate to say that I intentionally don’t take sides on this issue.  I’ve observed that as soon as a person does take sides, communication ends.  I hear from gay Christians who are very disappointed that I don’t condone their point of view, and I hear from traditional Christians who are very disappointed that I don’t condemn homosexual behavior.  As long as I get angry letters from both sides, I feel better.

it wasn’t so long ago that the church judged divorced people as harshly as they judge homosexuals today.

the church should primarily police itself, not the world at large (see 1 Corinthians 5).  We must humbly follow what Scripture teaches, but we must not single out one sin above others, and we must always show a spirit of love and humility.  That’s no answer, but may be the beginning of dialogue, at least.