I look at the little cheat sheet I made when I didn’t think the book itself would be available and scuffle through the papers hoping that all I have to do is copy down what another me already wrote, but I guess my other me didn’t know what to say either.  Tell me what you will miss when you die. I guess the “10 minutes” is assumed so I might as well get this over with.  I set my clock up to where it’s visible, double check- yep my Skype is on invisible, and wonder how my first typing prompt may be different from the rest.  We’ll soon find out, for the time starts now.

I can tell you what I miss from Nica, for that feels like another part of me that has in a sense, died.  I miss the horses in the streets and the sound of tropical birds.  Will there be tropical birds after I die?  Will I remember tropical birds enough to miss them, or even the regular cold ones, like that black capped chickadee that landed on my hand in the seventh grade and startled me so much that my hand jerked and just as quickly as it came it was gone.  It really shouldn’t have scared me, I was on a field trip with bird feed in my hand, hoping that one would choose me, but look away for one second and a little birdy can catch ya off guard.  I think I’ll miss the winter- I skipped that this past year, for in heaven I don’t think anything will be dead, including old branches that have such a serene look to them when covered by crystal white snow.  I think I’ll have most of the things I love here.  Not things as in materials, for I know this stuff must stay, but the passions, family, my best friend and lover, Christ.  I don’t think I’ll be missiong anything in fact for I’ll have everything I need.  Maybe I won’t be able to write for where there’s no conflict, there’s no story, but I think that need won’t be there.  I won’t need to validate myself in words that I can’t seem to speak.  When I die, I’ll miss being here to encourage those left here, but maybe I can leave something here for them while I have a chance.  A legacy for them to follow so even if I’m not here, I’m not missing out.


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